Time for a change

Change is good. I believe it with all of my heart, yet this particular change has not come quickly or easily. I have been procrasinating, waiting for inspiration, an aha! moment, a clean house, a stocked pantry, an organized desk. Today, however, I've decided to finally get on with it and write something, anything, because writing will help me to organize the real clutter, the memos and to- do lists that are taking up space in my head.

I have recently resigned as manager of a small CSA (community supported agriculture) project that I created nine years ago on the South Shore of Long Island, in New York. My CSA was made up of member volunteers who helped me to grow and maintain a beautiful acre of organic vegetables, herbs, and flowers that we divided amongst ourselves and donated to the local food pantry. I taught school children, hosted tours, wrote a newsletter, posted to a blog, gave lectures, mentored high school students and community volunteers, and in short, created a community of amazing people who grew to love the garden and each other.

I developed a passion for growing the food that I eat and I enjoyed knowing that it was free of toxic chemicals and pesticides. I became a better cook. I became an active participant in the food choices that I made. I became interested in the politics of food and began reading books on agriculture and food policy. I had become connected to the land, the programs, and the people. The garden was a place of healing and friendship as well as a spiritual place, where I could witness the miracle of growing things and blossoming relationships. I had grown to love my cultivated acre. It had become part of my identity, how I saw myself.

Disconnecting from the place that I have practically called home for so long has taken some time, but I have said my good byes and left the garden in very capable hands. And, what I have realized is that I am leaving behind only my legacy. Most of what was good about the garden ; the friends, the knowledge, the connections, and the trust, is in my heart and is coming with me on my next adventure. The community can easily be rebuilt, in another way, in another location. Sometimes all it takes is for one grain of sand to shift for a sea change to occur and I am ready for that change. It is time to begin another chapter and I must remind myself that it is not the destination that is important, but the journey itself. In time, the universe will provide and the path will become clear.